Ever go into a store or some sort establishment, or maybe seen some stranger on the street somewhere and the stranger felt compelled to call you by some "name" and they decided to use a universal nickname? I can't stand these. Depending on who they're coming from, they can be very degrading. For instance your standing in line, say at a liquor store, and there is some older guy, maybe in his 50's, hands you your change and say's "Thanks Chief"

What is that? What does that mean? Do I look like an American Indian? Am I the chief of police? No? "What's the deal with that Pablo???"

In honor of this jackass and others out there, here is a short list of other nicknames I never want to be called. If I don't know you, and you call me one of these, depending on how my day is going, you may get cracked in the nose.

  • Sport - I don't even know what this is in reference to, this seems like something an older guy will call you whilst he gives you a nickel.
  • Sonny - I am not your bastard child, nor will I ever be there to drop you off at an old folks home when your ready to kick it! I don't call you Geezer, don't call me sonny.
  • Pal - All I can think of is when your in 3rd grad and someone asked you to be their "pal" and then snickered and calls you their "Personal Ass Licker". God I hated that kid.
  • Captain - I am not a boat captain, I am not in the army, Fuck off.
  • Guy - I am a guy, ok so true that, but I don't call you female?
  • Buddy - We aren't friends, but this one is almost acceptable. It is not degrading, unless said sarcastically.
  • Kiddo - you're not going to get far with me on this one. I graduated the 2nd grade a LONG time ago
  • Tough-guy - This is something that is said purposely to piss you off. As if I can spit in your face and you wont do anything.
  • Slugger - Unless wearing a baseball jersey stained with dirt, this is not acceptable.
  • Professor- Although I ‘m probably a lot smarter than you, that doesn’t give you the right to assume anything. This callout is less offensive than others and displays a little creativity, but nevertheless, stop it.
  • Brother- We are not related. Die [insert nugget punch here]
  • Dude- Isn’t this a horse’s dick? I think so. If you would like to be referred to as animal genitalia, leave me out of it.
  • Jack- Old school nickname, probably the funniest if used in the correct context. Unfortunately, it ’s usually followed up by the term “shit”.