What, I don’t even get a reach around?
Posted on October 13, 2004 in SportsAfter watching the flogging the Sox took last night, NESN would have played 12 “keep the faith” commercials allowing me to sleep easier knowing I wasn't the only one crying inside.
Instead we were treated to FOX Sports … who's 7th inning stretch entertainment featured Tim McCockhead (McCarver) and Joe Buck circle jerking Derek Jeter and A-Rod. It’s impossible to watch a baseball game when all they can talk about are how “Calm Derek Jeters eyes are.”
If they spent equal time stroking Johnny Damon’s hair or talking about Gabe Kaplers physique .. I would chalk them up to just be a pair of gay announcers and be done with it. But we will be treated to a one sided New York Yankees jerk fest. Now I know I sound like a bitter Red Sox fan, but its un-deniable how pro-Yankees the Fox Sports newscasters are.
I actually though of changing the audio settings on the TV last night to SAP (Secondary Audio Program) and watching the remainder of the game in Spanish.
On a different note, I need to comment about the Mariano Rivera incident. I don’t ever think we will truly know who’s brilliant idea it was to electrify the pool water. Whether it was Rivera or some autistic housekeeper, it may go down as the stupidest idea ever.
God I hate the Yankees.
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Previous Comments
Yankees Suck
I missed the game last night. How was it? Did Matsui play? I was too worried cus the Sox "ACE" was pitching.
I was listening to NY radio the past couple of days (the FAN of course). The funny calls were the people who were disgusted with how unkempt the sox players were. They don't have clean-shaven faces, that's disgraceful to their town and to their family. Eh, whatever Beverly from Brooklyn.
On the other hand, I did not hear the nastiness that I heard when I switched over to WEEI on the way home. Maybe it was just the shows I caught, but there was more calls about how underrated Matsui is and how Rivera has been the most important player, not Jeter or Torre, for the past several years, and very few calls about ARod or Jeter.
Those losses did hurt though. If Ortiz would have a home from one of those at bats (The one off the glove or one with Manni on second last night) it might be a different story.
For a team that was built for the playoffs, they're unravelling pretty fast.
I am not a fan of baseball at all. Whatever, take it or leave it. But I will tell you this, I happened to be in NYC on wednesday night with a couple of friends who are Yankees fans. We caught most of the game at a bar near Times Square. I can tell you this, from being in Boston plenty of times, witnessing the absurdity of the fans, reading posts on this website, hearing fans call in to radio shows (I hear these third party because I wouldn't waste my time listening) I can tell you this: Red Sox fans are kind of like a battered wife that keeps coming back for more, and they both have the black eyes to prove it. The fans in NY were great, even though they make it to the playoffs almost every year, they have failed to pull the trigger in the world series in the most recent years, but they the fans don't peg them with any curse bullshit. They keep truckin. Now, before you try and comment back, keep in mind that I don't give a fuck about baseball. Its simply an un-biased opinion from a non-baseball fan. I will tell you this though, if a gun was put to my head and I was forced to be a fan of a MLB, then it would have to be the Yankees...who wants to support and old red sock? With that being said, how about some interesting posts on this website Mr. Webmaster "I should shave my almost beard" Web? I used to enjoy reading those. You could at least announce the birth of David and Sarahs baby girl, Sadie Jane Evans 8lbs 6oz 10/14/04. Which by the way is the same b-day as our friend Paul P., so lets hope that being born on the same day has nothing to do with punctuality or over-analyzation of mundane issues. Now that I've written this stupid comment, I don't even want to click the "post" button because I'm a rebel, thats right, a rebel. And I'm not gonna use spellcheck neither because I don't need to. See whatr I did there? I ended that last sentence with a preposition. That's a big no no! Let the grammar police track me down and write me a ticket. I'll take that ticket and shove it up their explenitve deleted so adverb that their noun will be adjective noun! HA! No. I do not have anything better to do at this moment. You have all my attention....ramble ramble ramble...Beer fest is in 2 weeks...ramble ramble ramble...you suck. I'm sure Eric will retort with some kind of gay comment, it will be a short comment like "dude ..." or maybe he'll pull off his skirt, take a picture of it, and try to pass it off as someone elses skirt that he "found" hanging in his closet with matching blouse. Reconfigure that computer boy! That was the last one. Mutha fuckin Stick.
Thrill, read below for required my gay retort.
You listen to a Yankee fan all day hype up his team, and we're the kinda crazy beaten wife that will bite your dick off one night.
Gross, It tastes like chicken, BITCH!
You are offically off my christmas list. I hope you get ghonorrea.
Congrads Dave and Sarah .. I haven't heard the news.
I think I hate McCarver more than the Yankees. Brandon Arrojo was suppose to pitch against Pedro Wednesday night according to him ..
If they are going to use the homer at least balance it with Sean McDonough or Remy.
My take on this crap:
Tim McYankee is a disgrace. Buck is just as bad. Thouse two should be doing the national league (Buck is the St. Louis announcer I believe...so we know who he is rooting for in the World Series). It's sad that Fox is biased and all they do is talk about the curse and "Daddy" as well as verbally blow Jeter, A-Rod and the entire Yankees team (especially McCarver). Last year Fox had a Yankee's brother doing color commentary (Bret f'n Boone), and this year they have another NY guy, albeit a Met (Although I enjoy his commentary, and he makes McYankee look like an ass when he corrects him about "Brandon Arroyo:).
On to my take:
There are true Yankees fans, like my girlfriend's parents (They live in NJ), and people from that area. There are also people who moved here from NY, and thats ok too.
Then there are these idiots in RI (and probably around the country):
1) The Derek Jeter Fan Club: Usually consists of girls ages 13 to 25 who think this Metrosexual pretty boy is a hottie. Usually slutty, lots of makeup. Cannot name one player on the Yankees besides Jeter or MAYBE A-Rod. Probably never watched one game ever. Possibly pregnant at age 15.
2) The Gangsta: These guys, usually ages 13-25 as well, idolize 50 cent and Jay-Z. Since they wear Yankees gear as part of their gettup, it fits the gangsta style to weat a colored Yankees cap. Similar the Derek Jeter Fan Club, they couldn't probably not name one person on the team. Maybe not even Jeter.
3) The Frontrunner: It's easy to like a winner. It's hard to root for the Red Sox, but they undoubtedly have the most loyal fans on par with the Cubs. The frontrunner can be any age/sex, and may possibly also enjoy the following teams: The Los Angeles Lakers, The Dallas Cowboys, The Detroit Red Wings. Similar to 1 and 2, these guys probably cannot name many players on any of these teams. May also enjoy the following sports individuals: Michael Vick, LeBron James, Alex Rodriguez, Derek Jeter, Carmelo Anthony, Allen Iverson, Terrell Owens, Barry Bonds, Jeremy Shockey.
4) The Guidos: My favorite one. Look, I'm 100% Italian, and I guess you could call me a guido too...so I can say this. THIS IS NOT is 1920's! We did not just get off the boat on Ellis Island! Just because Joe DiMaggio played back in the day for the Yankees does not mean you must root for them. You don't see Eric Webster rooting for the Dodgers because Eric Gagne has the same name and kind of looks like him! I think we have more Italians on the Red Sox now (Doug Mirabelli) than the Yankees (Giambi doesn't even play, plus hes on Roids). But again, this is the new millenium. We are all american. Who cares about the ethnicity of someone who played 50 something years ago? (No disrespect to Mr. DiMaggio, he was a legend)
In conclusion:
Open the Providence Journal Sports section every day. Who is featured???Sox, Pats, Bruins, Celts. As the old baseball adage goes: Root, Root Root for the home team, if they don't win it's a shame. Well, its a shame that we don't win all the time...but we will in due time, hopefully this year!
Keep the Faith!
That was the best retort from a Sox fan yet. If Pedro heard that he'd "Tip his hat and call you his Daddy".