Dear Theo,

Because I have enjoyed our one way correspondence in the past, I couldn’t resist writing you a final open letter.

I am deeply saddened to hear that you resigned as GM of the Boston Red Sox .. but I can’t really say I blame you. The way the Red Sox upper brass handled your situation is nothing short of a Dyuane Starks deplorable performance and I’m sure that is just the beginning of the shenanigans that comes with working for those fools.

I think I speak for everyone when I say that we all wished you would be hanging around for the next 15 years like you should be. We had some great memories together didn’t we? Remember that time you almost ran over my friend Dan when he was biking through the streets of Boston? That was fun.

I will miss these open letters to you even though you never responded to any of them in the past – I realize that you are a very busy person and its ok. I know that we won’t have much in common in the future but maybe I can write you anyways just to let you know how things are going.

Maybe we could trade those Christmas cards with photos of our pets dressed up in different holiday costumes in front of a very fake looking winter scenes, that would be nice. Think about it and let me know.

I think you need to somehow one up Larry Luchino and John Henry, maybe you should could drop a few “Upper Deckers” in their personal bathrooms –- that would surely do it.

You are just at the beginning of a long career (if you choose) as one of MLB’s premier GM’s and I hope you do not get discouraged by our shitty ownership.

Thanks for the world series trophy and all that – it was a lot of fun. Good Luck.